Originally Posted by forester814

But I am just stunned to see that I did not misunderstand your position somehow. You really do put all of the responsibility on the woman, and none on the man. And you believe that is the prevalent attitude out there.

I don't put all the responsibility on the woman. Biology did. If there were no social programs, many a single mother would be ass out. Many guys don't give a damn. That's just a cold hard fact. It's simply up to the woman to prepare a strong support system for her offspring.

Any woman having sex at any time had better be sure ahead of time that her partner will be a good father who will stick around forever, in case she gets pregnant. And if he says he will, and then runs off, that's her fault too. Really? Is that what you are really saying? Because I am still having trouble believing that's your (or anyone's) view.

It's her fault if she gets pregnant before at least marriage IMHO. Marriage show committment for more than just a quick release of sexual energy. Honestly, who else is responsible for a woman getting pregnant? The onus is all on the woman.

When I asked why guys aren't told not to have sex if they don't want to be fathers, all you said was, "Guys don't care" and mature slower than women. That's your excuse for laying it all on the woman? Men are immoral and childish by nature, and it just can't be helped? Rather than suggesting that guys need to man up, you say it is entirely up to the woman to insure that the child has two decent parents?

But what good is it for me to say that? I'm dealing in what IS not what "I wish" or "I hope". Women ARE the ones that are gonna be risking their life birthing the baby. Women ARE the ones that will have to make the decision to have an abortion. Women ARE then ones that will make the decision to give the baby up for adoption. Women ARE the ones that will make the decision to try and raise the baby alone. A man has no biological obligation for nothing but dropping sperm. It is up to the mother to make sure she is sleeping with a potential father and not some guy trying to get laid.

That is so sad and so screwed up, and so sexist, that I don't even know where to start.

See you are taking this too personal. I'm looking at this clinically. You have the situatiuon where a woman is gonna be the sole caregiver of a child if the man doesn't hang around. We know that woman and men generally place different levels of importance on sex. It's not sexist to say that a woman ought to safegaurd her procreative responsibilities. I'm not giving men an out or saying that this is "fair", I'm stating a fact.

Other than to ask, with the advice you have given me on how to raise my daughter, how will you raise and advise your son on these matters? (It's rhetorical, I'm not asking you to defend your parenting skills to me.)
If this is truly "how it is" out there, I have more reason than ever to fear for my daughter's future.