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Originally Posted by jhb90277  ================================================== ======
I suppose my kids belong to Generation T. There's an aging computer in their room which Dad sometimes uses. We have a playstation2 and a used Xbox. I recently gave my son my old digital camera that I got in 2001. That's about it. They are as happy playing outside as they are playing on the computer or the xbox. I would just as soon not have the consoles, but Dad likes to play on them, too. OK, I can handle that. I limit their time on them anyway.
That said, I tell my kids that it isn't about what you have, but who you are. It's not about what you look like, it's about what's inside you. I tell them that we don't have to have the latest and greatest since it'll be obsolete in 6 months, if it doesn't break beforehand. I tell them that before we get new stuff, sometimes we have to get rid of things that we don't use or play with.
I teach my kids to read labels and that they should be aware of how marketers want to exploit them. I look for examples of how things don't always live up the marketing hype and that it might look good in the commercial, but the reality is that it is likely not what they expect.
We don't try to keep up with the Joneses because we're not willing to go deeply into debt to finance it and besides, it doesn't bring happiness. It just brings a stack of stuff the the kids grew bored with because their imaginations weren't engaged. When some of my kids' friends live in $3-5M homes and they have the latest of everything, once in a while I have to explain why. I think my older son gets it. My younger son doesn't really notice it yet.
As far as role models go, it is not the job of the sports star or movie star to be a role model, but kids will see them and say, "Well, that guy is into fighting pit bulls, so it must be pretty exciting." I'm not suggesting that kids are going to dress in drag because Dennis Rodman did it, but they might dig the tats and piercings and want to do it because of someone they see. That's not all kids, but some might. I'd like to give kids credit for being able to make intelligent, informed decisions, but not all kids have been given the tools to do that. For those kids, Vick and others like him may be role models whether they want the job or not. | I liked your comment on telling your children that "it's not what you have, but who you are". More parents need to tell their children this.It's not really the children's fault because businesses have marketing departments that tell them that they can chargre enormous amounts of money for their product, and the people will want it". I remember a few years (quite a few!) ago when the Cabbage Patch doll came out . It was the ugliest thing I had ever seen, but there were stories about fights in stores, robberies, even parents flying overseas to obtain one! That set off the "Christmas Toy Race" as every toy manufacturer fought to come up with the next hot rage. Remember "Tickle Me, Elmo?" Another case of America needing to have something the next person doesn't.
I have two nephews who are into the gym shoe thing. It's actually a shame when people are robbed, even murdered for a damn pair of shoes! I ask my nephews "What is so special about these shoes in relation to any other pair"? Being young, the first answer I got was "They are the best." The marketing has gotten to the point where kids actually believe that there is such a pair of shoes that can make someone run faster and jump higher than anyone else. I was so glad when my brother told me that the local school system in their town enacted the wearing of school uniforms as a school policy. The kids don't like it, but in time; hopefully they'll see the reason for it.
You are also correct in that celebrities are in this role as models, whether they like it or not. I still think that we as parents, much as you have instilled in your sons, still must be the primary role models for our children.To expect others to teach our exact values as we see them is just asking for trouble- just ask any parent whom last year thought Mike Vick or Paris Hilton could fill that role. |