tyreay

A newlywed couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."
"Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, pretty face. I' m going to have a beer."
The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"
She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, England etc.
The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, lolly pop...but at the bar you know...they have frozen glasses..."
He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying...
"You want a frozen glass, puppy face?"
She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, tootsie roll, but at the Bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long, I'll be right back. I promise. OK?"
You want hors d'oeuvres, poochi pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, sausage rolls, mushroom caps, vol-au-vents, etc.
“But my sweet honey... At the bar... You know...there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."
"You want dirty words, D**khead? Drink your f**king beer in your Goddamn frozen mug and eat your motherf**king snacks, because you are Married now, and you aren't f**king going anywhere! Got it, A**hole?"

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Politics, it seems to me, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong. ~Richard Armour

There are many men of principle in both parties in America, but there is no party of principle. ~Alexis de Tocqueville

Hio

poor guy lol

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What Profit Is It To A Man...If He Gains The World But Loses His Own Soul {Matthew 16:26}

garysher

Funny joke and it makes a good point.

Marriage shouldn't be about tying down the other person. It should be about wanting to make them happy.

If the woman enjoy sgoing shopping with a girlfriend let her go.

If the guy enjoys a few beers with his buddies at the pub let him go.

So many women fail to grasp this basic truth.

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Hio

Yeah but more and more couples now are now falling to fear of cheating for some reason. What happened to trust :\

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What Profit Is It To A Man...If He Gains The World But Loses His Own Soul {Matthew 16:26}

garysher

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akuma

Trust is something that now can be verified through cell phone records, ez-pass records, and e-mail records. I think it is easier to be truthful than deceitful now.

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One pill makes you larger and one pill makes you small,
And the ones that mother gives you don't do anything at all.

fxashun

I like that story though. If I were that guy, I buy a 60 inch TV and invite my friends over. It'll be cheaper and he seems to have a hell of a waitress/bartender. I have a home theater downstairs, I wish my wife would try that trick, she'll end up collecting tips.

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dhellemmes

Haha,very funny,but I don't want my lift become like this.

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