OhDear

This is my big attempt to be totally transparent and honest with everyone, straight or gay.

I find distinctions between embracing gay sex and embracing gay rights. I embrace gay rights. Because whatever someone does privately, in a relationship with a consenting adult, is none of my business. Not grounds to gain rights or lose rights.

And people are valuable to community, to society, to the world. And that not based on how they express their sexuality.

But perhaps they feel a greater value when they are not only allowed, but honored for the relationships they choose to give meaning and purpose to their own mortality.

Now I do not have the orientation given to practice gay sex. I do however recognize how close a bond I can have with a woman as a friend. Still, I would not ever choose to express that closeness sexually. In fact, and this is where I do not want to hurt any gay people, but the truth is, I find that to be quite unnatural.

Now before all the people that want to say gay is wrong or immoral, jump on that statement, remember, perhaps gay people find heterosex unnatural too, cos it is not within their inclinations either.

Still, I will say, for me...the only word I can think to call gay sex is unnatural.

But I will advocate for gay rights in a good many venues, with my vote, in what I speak and who I choose to stand with.

OhDear

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englishsunflower

Oh Dear...........Thank you. We know that some people fill our way of life is unnatural. One of my sons fills that way,but he also knows what I have had to go through in the past 7 yrs. just to be with the one I love. He also will fight for my rights becouse he fills that just becouse I don't live the life he does it doesn't mean I should be treated like a second class citizen.
I do no wrong to anyone.I respect others filling and lifestyles. As long as they respect mine. All we want is to live our life and fill safe that we have the rights of others.That someone will not hang a noose on our door or burn a cross in our yard.The bad thing is in America that maybe the way things are going,but with people like you we stand a chance of turning this country around.I do hope someday to be able to come back home.To be able to see my children and grandchildren more than once a yr.To work and pay my taxes and complain about how much I am paying just like everyone elce.Thank you again for your support.

gigg

I applaud your honesty ohdear !!

and gracefuly accept your support

you are correct in that it is natural for me to be with woman and is totally unnatural to me to be with a man.
I personally dont feel that any sexual preference that involves 2 consenting adults is unnatural, the choice is theirs by right. We all deal with things in the best way we can and it is better to support each other than to fight over our differences, life is way too short for that.

garysher

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tristanrobin

great post, oh dear - my name is Tristan and I approve this message!

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"know this is EXACTLY why people think you shouldnt have equal rights" 2/11/08 Grace

garysher

Thanks Trissie it's not often you compliment my posts!

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OhDear

Thank you for the gracious responses by my gay friends, family in the family of humanity. I am happy to know each of you.

I want to clarify that though I said that bit about "unnatural" I did not mean it in any way to insult or criticize. I am saying that attraction is ingrained as natural and what I am attracted to is what I find "natural"...thus my orientation.

You see, I do not know what it is to be rejected or refused rights, but I did carry a bit of a stigma at a time in my childhood. You see, I am left-handed. Well, my parents decided to join a particular denomination of the Christian religion when I was seven years old. So because they were not already members, they had to go to classes. And the classes began in the evening, either before or after some Lenten services at the church. I was in tow. And the Pastor at the church gave me some paper and a pen to write, to "take notes" or whatever I wanted to do with those writing supplies to occupy myself.

As soon as I started to write, he commented to my parents, "Oh I see little Bonnie is left-handed."

My parents nodded. And I did in an instant remember in kindergarten when I first picked up one of those big fat pencils and how the teacher yelled at me for not holding it right. And put me in derision in front of the whole class.

But of course my parents went to bat for me on that.

But all the same that memory coupled with the next words from the pastor:
"You know only a couple hundred years ago, lefties were suspect to being children of the devil."

Well...I got scared!

Though my parents and the pastor went on to talk about how false an impression that is, I could only hear those words echo over and over for weeks or maybe even months. And I wondered if I belonged to the devil. I prayed to Jesus that it not be so. And yet, I was afraid to go to bed at night, and I was afraid of myself! And when I wrote, I clutched my pencil so tightly, wanting to make sure it was me and not the devil in control of my writing.

Well the thing is, left-handed may seem unnatural to someone who is right handed, but my goodness! It is not warranting the judgement of "being of the devil" and it is not warranting trying to get someone to use their right hand instead. And it is not warranting being afraid of or denying dignity and rights to the left handed folk among us. Being left handed is MY orientation. I have tried to write with my right hand, but it is unnatural and the results are unfulfilling.

OhDear

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OhDear

Gary,

quick! You are having a meltdown!!!

An identity crisis, yourself!!!
You are NOT me.

Tristan said "Oh Dear" not Garysher...

OhDear
( a Packer fan!!! )

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forester814

Thank you for your heartfelt and and compassionate words, OD, and for backing those words up with actions.

We could definitely do with more of that, not just on this board, but in this country and in the world.

And likewise, I am all for straight rights, even though I get a little grossed out if I think too much about straight sex. It's not for me, but I certainly wouldn't want to see its practicioners denied rights because of my feelings about it.

(And... go Pack!)

englishsunflower

he's been lost in space for a while now.Seeing little green men you know.Know wonder he mistook his name for yours lol