Self-Love and Self-Admiration

KnightOfSappho · 03-19-2007, 08:48 PM

Quote:

Perhaps this should be another thread, but it seems to be that many believe that it is NOT okay to acknowledge and be proud of the individual's own good traits.

When people pay compliments, we tend to minimize them and blow them off as a matter of social training.

I know what you mean, it comes off as arrogant and conceited to acknowledge one's accomplishments.

But I'll totally do it anyway.

Unfortunately, we are taught that it is NOT okay for us to be cool with ourselves. It is arrogant to think well of yourself? Why do many feel obligated to minimize when someone pays a compliment?

Why do you think this is?

KnightOfSappho · 03-23-2007, 10:28 PM

Also...

How much of this comes from religious belief and how much fromsimple social training?

garysher · 03-23-2007, 11:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KnightOfSappho

Unfortunately, we are taught that it is NOT okay for us to be cool with ourselves. It is arrogant to think well of yourself? Why do many feel obligated to minimize when someone pays a compliment?

Why do you think this is?

I don't think it is true in all cases. Certainly not in my case.

I feel "cool" with myself most of the time.

Sorry to hear you don't, but we could chat about it off line if you like?

tadpole256 · 03-30-2007, 12:37 PM

I feel that I am very comfortable with myself. However, I believe modesty prevents us from becoming arrogant.

tristanrobin · 03-30-2007, 01:02 PM

I'm smart; I'm compassionate; I'm sexy; and, doggone it, people like me.

:P

KnightOfSappho · 03-31-2007, 02:17 PM

Okay...

Perhaps we shouldn't focus on our own individual self-admiration statuses.

I also, am very comfortable with who I am and I KNOW that I'm cool.

The context that I was observing is general society. People, as a rule, are uncomfortable accepting compliments or praise, and tend to be shy about saying good things about their own abilities and talents.

I wanted to discuss the influences that have created this.

KnightOfSappho · 03-31-2007, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tadpole256

I feel that I am very comfortable with myself. However, I believe modesty prevents us from becoming arrogant.

Is it modesty, or is it social training?

Why is it 'arrogant' to speak well of yourself or to say 'look what I can do?'

garysher · 03-31-2007, 03:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KnightOfSappho

People, as a rule, are uncomfortable accepting compliments or praise, and tend to be shy about saying good things about their own abilities and talents.

I wanted to discuss the influences that have created this.

I don't find that to be true at all, certainly not in America, which has a culture that is high on "recognition" and the cult of the individual.

Northern Europeans are far more reserved and averse to personal praise.

And in Japanese society, where concensus and deference are everything, personal praise is anathema

tristanrobin · 03-31-2007, 04:01 PM

You stole my joke and put it in your signature.
You should attribute it.

garysher · 03-31-2007, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tristanrobin

You stole my joke and put it in your signature.
You should attribute it.

So you WERE kidding??