Thought I'd pass the giggles around...

The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled
"You Can Be THE Man Of Your House."

He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, "From now on,
you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is Law.
You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished
eating my meal, you will serve me a sumptuous dessert.

"After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have
the kind of sex that I want.

"Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will
wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then, you will
massage my feet and hands.

"Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?"

The wife replied, "The funeral director would be my first
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats?

They don't become so attached to the lawyers.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Why can't the Irish beocme lawyers?

Because they can't pass the bar.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Great To Be A Guy

Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

Your orgasms are real. Always.

Your last name stays put.

The garage is all yours.

Nobody secretly wonders if you swallow.

Wedding plans take care of themselves.

Chocolate is just another snack.

You can be president.

You can wear a white shirt to a water park.

Foreplay is optional.

Car mechanics tell you the truth.

You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

The world is your urinal.

Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.

Same work... more pay.

Wrinkles add character.

You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.

If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or irreparably mangle your feet.

@#$% movies are designed with you in mind.

Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"

Those were a riot Ali!!!

The first one though, if the guy would not demand it,but just as a way to show love well, it sounds fun. Especially if there could be turn-taking. Like the guy gets spoiled spa treatment on Monday-Wednesday-Friday. And then the wife gets the care on Tues.-Thurs.-Sat.
And on Sunday? Heck I don't know...what to do with Sunday???


Well I really did laugh at all the jokes. Thanks for posting it!

OD

Go to a spa and let them pamper both the hubby and wife?

Hmmmmm, mud wrestling...Sounds like a plan to me.

Too funny Ali!

OD

Loved those...thanks for the chuckles!!!

Chuckles! I love that word, Sally. Haven't thought of it for quite a time.

There even use to be a candy you could get that had four or five different colored sugared gel candies in it and that was called Chuckles.

Wonder if anyone else here is old enuf to remember those?

OD

Now that sounds like fun!!!

I do. They were tasty.