These are all true statements. But what makes it funny is that the only thing that has changed is the times...

Scenario: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1956 - Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his to show Jack.

2006 - School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.

1956 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends.

2006 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Jeffrey won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1956 - Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by Principal. Sits still in class.

2006 - Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad gives him a whipping.

1956 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.< BR>
2006 - Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state psychologist that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to school.

1956 - Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the smoking dock.

2006 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.

1956 : Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.

2006 : Pedro's cause is taken up by state democratic party. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he can't speak English.

+++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.

1956 - Ants die.

2006 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

+++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to com fort him.

1956 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2006 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison.

Scenario: Peter falls in love with Stephen at university

1957 - Police are called, Peter is given electric shock treatment for 5 years and then commits suicide. Stephen is sent to prison for 10 years.

2007 - Peter and Stephen form a relationship, graduate with good degrees and set up home together.

+++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Susan leaves school with excellent results and a great business idea

1957 - Susan is told that a woman's place is in the home, and she shouldn't worry her pretty little head about it and should think about finding herself a husband instead

2007 - Susan's company is floated on the stock market for $1bn and she receives a prestigious business award

+++++++++++++++++++++

Scenario: Mahesh and his family move from India to the UK

1957 - Despite being persuaded by an advertising campaign from a UK government in desperate need of workers that citizens from the Commonwealth will have a bright new future in the UK, Mahesh is spat at in the street, and all the places advertising lodgings have signs saying "no dogs, Irish or blacks" in the window.

2007 - Mahesh gets a job in a software company, develops some new products and starts up his own company

I heard that story. Mind-BOGGLING!
Was explained as "zero tolerance".
And for the record, the "headache medicine" involved was over the counter. I don't recall if it was specifically ibuprofen or aspirin, but it wasn't "medicinal marijuana".


The guy who heads one of the software divisions in my company is "Mahesh".
I'm hoping he sticks with this company for now...

Thanks, Fluffmeister.

I agree that there are some silly and yet destructive things going on these days. (Expelled for using aspirin {or Midol} at school is the silliest of all the examples.)

But to quote Paul Harvey, "Now you know the rest of the story."

I like all of those, very true.

Got one:

Scenario: Eight year old Christopher points a chicken finger at a teacher during lunch and says "pow, pow".

1956- Teacher tells Christopher to quit playing with his food because there are people starving in China.

2006- Teacher feels her life is threatened, Christopher is apprehended and given a three day suspension.

I dunno about a chicken finger...go along the lines of an essay of the same sort and yeah you got it

Oh, it happened.

Arkansas Boy Suspended for Pointing Chicken Finger [Free Republic]