MUSLIM QUARTERBACK

The coach had put together the perfect team for the Eagles.

The only thing missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the colleges and even the canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl victory.

Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm.

He threw a hand- grenade straight into a window from 80 yards away. Then he threw another grenade from 50 yards down a chimney, and then hit a passing car going 80 miles per hour.

I've got to get this guy!" coach said to Himself. "He has the perfect arm!" So, he brings the young Afghan to the States and teaches him the great game of football ...... and sure enough the Eagles go on to win the Super Bowl.

The young Afghan is hailed as a hero of football, and when the Coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants to do is call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you," the old Muslim woman says. "You deserted us. You are not my son!"

"Mother, I don't think you understand," pleads the son, "I've just won the greatest sporting event in the world!"

"No! Let me tell you," his mother retorts," at this very moment there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get assaulted!" The old lady pauses, then tearfully says, "I will never forgive you for making us move to Philladelphia."

5 rules for men to follow in order to be happy
1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from time to time, cleans up and has a job.

2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.

3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie to you.

4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.

5. It's very, very important that these four women don't know each other.

Hahaha

Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.

To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

A gorgeous young blonde woman gets sick and tired of men trying to pick her up in bars because she's beautiful, blonde, and so men thought she was easy. One she decides to show everyone. She goes home and decides to smarten herself up. She decides to learn the capitals of all the fifty states.


Week after week she practices until she knows them all. Finally, she is once again ready to go back to the bar. She sits down and after a few seconds a guy comes up to her and starts hitting on her. It is soon evident that he just wants to take her home and have sex with her. The lovely blonde says emphatically, "But I'm not just beautiful! I'm smart too!!" "Yeah, yeah. I believe you," says the young stud. "Now let's go."

Again she protests. "No, really I am smart. I know the capitals of all the states." The guy starts walking away, getting sick of her. She follows him. "Really, go ahead ask me a state. I'll give you its capitol and show you how smart I am."


Just to get rid of her, the guy says, "Fine. What's the capital of New Mexico?"


The breathtaking blonde looks at him proudly and says. "New Mexico has two capitals: 'N' and 'M'."

Okay... I told a cute and funny joke here the other day about the Irish family.

But now I was doing a quick look / see online and thought to mix a bit of wisdom with the funny...

Confucius Says:

Man who stand on toilet high on pot.


OhDear

Joe Jitsu say;

Quote:

Better to have wax head in real hand, Than... Real head in wax hand.

OhDear

Four CEO's of the big beer companies meet for a drink. The president of Budweiser orders a Bud. Miller's president orders a Millers and the president of Coors orders a Coors. When it is Guinness turn to order he orders a soda. Why didn't you order a Guinness everyone asks? Nah Guinness replies. If you guys aren't having a beer neither will I.

CLICK HERE

OhDear