Rafah, Gaza | Palestinian Hamas television's beloved terrorist faux-"Mickey Mouse" may have been axed (or martyred) last year, but fear not, fear-inducers. Starting this fall, Hamas introduces not one, but a brand new cell of loveable characters devoted to the cause of kiddie-jihad.

On Mondays, extremist toddlers and parents will rejoice in the antics of Baby Ker-Blooey, the Suicide Bomber Duck.

Following that theme, Tuesdays will feature the hilarious adventures of Ahmed Kasper, Heroic Martyr-Turned-Friendly-Ghost.

Wednesdays will be wacky with the escapades of everyone's favorite unemancipated female, Betty Boop-in-a-Burka.

On Thursdays, Shiites and Sunnis will all be tuned to Salaam, Salaam, Salaam, It's Fat Abdullah!

But perhaps the most anticipated new show, acclaimed by radical critics and mullahs alike, will air Fridays: Abu al-Tweety, Who Tawt He Taw a Zionist Puddy Tat... and Beheaded Him.

-- Woody Latham